This has always been a lively person who suddenly became so sick and weakly lying on the hospital bed. I stood straight at the edge of the bed, my whole heart as if squeezed hard by a huge air pressure…
The other co-workers are following suit and Vovo is actually peeling her apples herself! It really made everyone’s eyes crack and bleed~~~ She was half alive and still wanted to tease Vovo, “Is this my work injury, boss? Can someone be appointed to look after me?”
I was too dumb to know what to say. Words like “I’m sorry” or “thank you” never seemed to come between us. It was as if she was always an unreliable person, always enjoying herself at my disdain or scorn…
I wanted to get close to her, touch her hair, tuck her in or peel an apple – but someone else was already peeling it, and it was someone who would be more ideal for her than me.
It didn’t take long for other colleagues to go back to work one after another, and there were only three of us left in the ward. Vovo gently told her to rest and not to eat, but I felt like a stick standing there, useless, and in the way.
So I went out.
I walked back and forth in the hallway twice, feeling even more stupid, so I found a seat next to the vending machine and started staring.
Why are you being so nice to me?
Do you know that it’s terrible for people to get used to it but can’t own it at all!
It took me three seconds to realize that I was thinking about this! This really scares the hell out of me! Ahhhh I must be going crazy!
I’m crying out in my heart – a person who has been around since childhood and is irresponsible and weird thinking. Who doesn’t study hard, doesn’t work hard, is greedy for fun, lacks depth, and always looks at love in a casual way. Whose outlook on life, values, and worldview are all so… Unlimited. Vulgar. Dependent. Of. Home… Partner! And still a woman! I… I, I… How could I-?
But why am I thinking about her right now? The one who ate the cake to her infinite satisfaction, the one who insisted on giving me her coat, the one who sneaked up on me while following me, the one who shamelessly stole kisses from me, the one who followed me like a dog, the one who blocked my drink without saying a word, the one whose palm was very warm and strong…
And yet it all came to a screeching halt, just because I suddenly thought of one thing: she was in love with Vovo, this time in a more serious way than ever before, and it looked very promising at the moment.
The very thought of this completely emptied me out like I had a feeling that the world was coming to an end…
The two tears I’d been holding back for half a day finally fell very shamefully, and I ducked behind the vending machine and quickly pulled out a tissue and wiped them away haphazardly.
I, for one, had to secretly resolve these false thoughts so that everything would be as if it never happened.
Yes, it’s like it never happened.
Having done this mental construction repeatedly, I tried to maintain my composure and returned to the ward.
“There’s still some business to take care of at the office, I’ll be leaving.” Vovo explained as she bowed her head and packed her bag, “You take care of her, and you can both skip work tomorrow.”
And then she drifted off on a breeze, leaving us alone.
Deep breaths, mental building; deep breaths, mental building; deep breaths, mental building. (Everything is hocus pocus, an illusion…)
She stared at me with a level of concentration that gave me goose bumps and made my heart even more tingly…. She beckoned me over, then put on hand on the back of my shoulder and pressed me gently against her chest with her other hand at the back of my head.
I told myself that the patient was the greatest, the greatest, and so I showed an extremely rare cooperation.
“Hey, it’s actually not exactly the same thing. The doctor said that I have been eating irregularly, and I didn’t pay attention to it, and my stomach was bad. This time it was just an incentive.”
“….Oh” I sulked out, feeling shameless… so comfortable being hugged like this.
“Of course, if you’re really guilty, I don’t mind if you share half of your bonus with me!”
“……” I’m not in the mood for jokes like that with her.
“Well, stop thinking about it,” she suddenly softened her voice, “You know I don’t like watching you cry.”
I jumped up and down like a spring, “Who’s crying! Don’t be ridiculous!”
“Tsk ……” she shook her head sadly and pulled a tissue from the box to start wiping my eyes – the tissue darkened to such an extent that I had to believe that I had just shown up in such a faded panda makeup.
I. Forgot. Remember. From. Already. Drawing. Over. Eye. Liner. Up.
“Okay,” she imprinted a light kiss on each of the cleaned left and right eyelids, smiling brightly, “No more crying, it’s okay!”
Now I wanted to cry even more.