“I’m so beautiful, is it wrong to pretend to be a badass?” Su Xingyu glared at me fiercely. I have no doubt that if I say something wrong, I will be divided into five horses by her.
“Yes, yes ^O^” I said ingratiatingly, “ugly people pretending to be funny, beautiful people pretending to be cool and handsome.”
“I didn’t expect you to have some insights at a young age. Give me the phone.” Su Xingyu spread out her hand.
“Phone?” This topic changed really fast, “What do you want my phone for?”
“To make a phone call.”
“Oh.” Probably because her phone was out of battery, I dutifully handed her my phone.
Su Xingyu played with my phone with much curiosity, and almost disassembled it to check the parts inside. Finally she looked amazed and carefully held my phone, “I didn’t expect you to carry an antique with you. This mobile phone has really gone through the vicissitudes of life and witnessed the development of the times. It should be put in a museum for sale!”
My face turned red and I took the phone back from her. Use or don’t use it. My phone is just a little bit older, a little bit more old-fashioned, a little bit less functional, but it’s just as good for making calls as it is for surfing the Internet! There is no need to mock me so much!
What about the trust between people, the care for each other? I don’t dare to believe in friendship anymore, see debt1!
“What, I haven’t called yet!” Su Xingyu did not perceive my displeasure and grabbed my phone again. Tsk-tsk-tsk while making a phone call.
“It’s still keyboard type. Is this phone a gift from someone important? It’s already so worn out and still can’t be replaced?”
Su Xingyu pressed the phone on. From the old-fashioned keyboard phone, came a crackling sound when pressed and sluggish like an old man.
I covered my face with my hands. Somehow, hearing this sound, a sense of inferiority rose in my heart that I was at a loss. This phone was not at all given by any important person. It’s not that I am reluctant to change it, but I am simply incapable of changing it.
Because I’m…. poor.
“Su Qianqian, you come and look, what happened to your phone? It’s all white!” Su Xingyu’s panicked voice pulled me back from my own thoughts.
I took a look and it turned out that the phone had the habit of going awry again and the screen was snow white.
Su Xingyu looked like something terrible had happened to her, “It’s not in the middle. Top. It’s red! Not good, is it being controlled remotely?”
Seeing her fussing around like a bumpkin2, I was suddenly relieved. Even if the phone was broken, old, and bad, it was still something I traded my efforts for. Maybe when I was complaining about the old phone, there were others who didn’t have a phone to use.
The fact that you are poor is not a shameful thing ╮(╯▽╰)╭
“Give it to me.” I took the phone, calmly slammed it hard against the car, picked it up again, and slammed it hard a few more times!
Finally, I picked it up and looked at it, the screen flashed a few times and finally returned to normal. “Okay, here, use it!”
Su Xingyu dumbly took my phone, a face confused, and finally sighed, “I’m taking it…”
I pretended to give a domineering smile, “An m-brand phone, it just lacks falls, I cleaned it up and it obeyed.”
My phone is like a protagonist who can’t die, still survived strongly and made the call.
A string of strange songs that I couldn’t understand slowly came out of the car and Su Xingyu took her phone out of her pocket and pressed off the ringer.
“Your phone has power.” I looked at her bitterly, are you kidding me?
“Yes, it has power. I’m just exchanging a phone number.” Su Xingyu took the two phones and played with them, snapping her number in my phone and my number in hers.
It’s okay to exchange a mobile phone. I was comforting myself and listened to Su Xingyu’s words “I added your BB account, Kuanbo account, and width account… you accept it.”
“Nani3?” I opened my phone to connect to the Internet, and I saw that all the online social accounts had friend requests.
“How do you know my BB account, Kuanbo account, and width account?” I couldn’t believe it, my heart flooded with fear, feeling that all my information was exposed. Could it be that I am being human fleshed by her4?
“Are you stupid?” Su Xingyu still held his mobile phone and continued to send friend requests. My phone kept ringing with the sound of di di di, “These accounts are bound to the mobile phone numbers.
Just sync the phone numbers.”
I closed my eyes and was powerless to spit out, “Routines, it’s all routines… please use less routines and be more sincere…”
“What does this little one know.” Su Xingyu rubbed my hair and said salaciously like an old driver, “Since ancient times, affections can not be kept, it is always the routine that wins the hearts of people, quickly accept my friend request.”
“Hmph!” I disapproved of this behavior of being forced to give all my social accounts, and indignantly accepted one friend request after another from her.
Ying-Bing-Ye Shang-R-Xiaoyaomao requested to add you as a friend
Verification Information: It’s me.
Source: Contact Search
Looking at this message, the corners of my eyes twitched. Forgive me for not having graduated from high school, but I do not recognize the last three words of her screen name, nor do I know who! Is! I5!
“What are you waiting for, accept it quickly. Could it be that you are so happy to get my contact number?”
I showed a peevish smile and reluctantly pressed the agree button.
“There are others, what are you dawdling about, are you really so happy that your actions are retarded?”
You have a new fan: I wake up beautiful everyday by myself
From cell phone contact list
You have a new friend: Me from the stars
When I finally got on the various accounts and accepted the requests, I didn’t expect her to set up an automatic reply for adding friends on each account.
[Please quietly appreciate my beauty and don’t disturb my life.]
Pfft! How can someone set up this kind of auto-reply? Isn’t this a cat disease6 haha, luckily I’m not drinking water right now hahaha!
Suddenly, I heard the sound of di di di on my BB again and there were dozens of more friend posts. I clicked to see and saw that Su Xingyu actually liked every single comment I made.
I also planned to go onto her page to give some likes, but once I saw the number of likes and comments below her, I felt that if I was one more, I was not one more, and if I was one less, I was just a drop in the ocean. I would not even make a ripple in the comment section.
[Ying-Bing-Ye Shang-R-Xiaoyaomao]: [picture] From now on, I hope I can slowly become ugly. One day a little ugly, another day a little ugly. If this continues, one day, I can look straight at my beauty… …
Retweeted 5,201,314|Commented 8,433,981,876|Liked 9,999,999,999
The picture is probably the back of Su Xingyu. I have surprisingly gotten used to her intolerant remarks about looking directly at her but a look at the number of retweets, comments, and likes, the whole situation is not good. On my page, I can get more than a few dozen likes, Su Xingyu is not buying a water army, right?
I would like to see the many comments, who wrote them, and what they commented! I eagerly clicked on the comment section and felt a headache, full of doubts about whether I had been derailed from society.
[Queen’s Leg Pendant7]: Ah!!! Exciting!!! Grabbed the first floor! A big release of benefits today!!! Beautiful photos of the Queen! So beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful… Important things need to be said three million times!
[Queen’s Hand Pendant]: In the past, Einstein conquered the world by wisdom, Columbus conquered America by boat, Qin Shi Huang conquered China by force, today, the Queen conquered us with only one back!
[Queen’s Head Pendant]: Nothing needs to be said, Your Majesty: I will give birth to a soccer team for you!
[Queen’s Back Pendant]: The Queen’s back is gentle and cold. Gentle enough to leave us a back, and cold enough to leave only a back for us….
Just reading these few comments, I feel a stomachache, and give a laugh hahaha! Three million times? You definitely copied and pasted, right? Columbus conquered America by boat? Did you learn your history from a gym teacher? The birth of a soccer team? You’re a sow who gave birth to a dozen! Gentle and cold? You’re delusional!
I was sure at once, these are definitely not Su Xingyu’s hired water army. No water army organization will use this ←_←
I continue to look, more puzzled, has my aesthetic lagged behind the public so much?
[Queen’s Little Servant Xiao Mei]: Lick the screen lick the screen! The Queen is really beautiful! Even the back is so beautiful that people are angry with the sky and the world is invincible! Already fainted in the bathroom!
[Queen’s Little Driver Xiao Wang]: I was in a car accident and was in bed as a vegetable for five years, but the doctor happened to put this photo of the Queen’s back in front of me and I miraculously woke up! Woke! Up! Now I’m in great health! Your Majesty! You are my savior! I am willing to give my life to you!
[Queen’s Killer Bodyguard]: Upstairs! You dare to peep at the Queen! I will hunt you to the ends of the Earth! Wait for your family to die!
[Queen’s Little Driver Xiao Wang’s Family]: Come on, you come on~ You can’t hit me across the Internet~ Can’t~ Hit~ Me~
[Queen’s Little Driver Xiao Zhang]: I know Xiao Wang, he lives next door to me, I will go and clean him up now!
These divine comments made me want to kneel. I clicked on their information and found that they are actually popular! Not a water army!
Scrolling down the comments, there was finally something different.
[Queen’s Second Housekeeper]: So… now during working hours, are you all brushing BB?
[Queen’s Little Servant Xiao Mei]: … …
[Queen’s Little Driver Xiao Wang]： … …
[Queen’s Little Driver Xiao Zhang]：… …
[Queen’s Little Servant Xiao Mei]: For the Queen, even if the wages are deducted Xiaomei is still willing!
[Queen’s Little Driver Xiao Wang]: Just please don’t kick us out!
[Queen’s Little Driver Xiao Zhang]: Let us wait for the Queen silently!
I exhaled and turned to look at the person involved. Could it be that I was really blind and did not see her invincible beauty8?
The author has something to say:
Su Qianqian: I originally thought that Su Xingyu did not take the medicine, why do I suddenly feel that I did not take the medicine QAQ
1 “See debt!” means “This friendship is over!”
2 “土包子” or “Bumpkin” means an honest person that is naive and mocked/laughed at for not having seen the world
3 “呐泥” literal translation is “Na ni”
4 “Human flesh” just means to have your personal information found by someone illegally. Basically to be stalked on social media and eventually the person finds very personal information like your address, etc.
5 “I don’t know who! Is! I!” what Qianqian does not understand is the “I”. The “I” is translated from “zhen” and “zhen” is first person possessive and often used by emperors because it is noble yet not too condescending. The “zhen” came from the verification information where Su Xingyu says “It’s me.”
6 “Cat disease” I think I’ve already explained this but it usually refers to making fun of those who have/do behaviors beyond the common sense. It’s all for fun, not to make others extremely mad.
7 “Leg pendant” = The thighs!!!
8 If it makes you feel better, I don’t see the invincible beauty either. All I see is her opinion of her ego.
9 Hahaha! You should check it out if you haven’t!!!
Translator: Finally!! Finally got this chapter done! *Sniff* I feel very emotional right now. Somebody… hand me a shovel so I can dig my grave.